Real-World Speed Probe
PSI cosplay vs real users. Probe a URL, get results.
Metrics
Headers
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Results
Stop grading vibes. We probe a URL and call BS where it counts: TTFB, cache headers, cookie bombs, DOM/script bloat, a rough LCP hint, and an edge-vs-origin sanity check. If it cheats the meter, we score it.
What it actually checks
TTFB & total time (HTML) — how long until the server coughs up bytes.
Cache status — public/max-age/s-maxage vs no-cache; also flags Set-Cookie on HTML (edge killer).
Headers — raw dump for receipts (CF/X-Cache, etc.).
HTML size — rough payload in B/KB/MB.
DOM weight — approximate tag count (a landfill warning).
Script count — external vs inline, because “just one more SDK” is how web rot happens.
LCP heuristic — looks at the first <img>: lazy-loaded without priority? We ding it. Preload? We note it.
Edge vs Origin — compare standard request vs cache-busted; big delta = edge doing work.
Asset timing (opt-in) — first CSS and first IMG TTFB for “is the critical path even reachable?”